Category: anxiety

  • Dealing with Post-Break Overwhelm + Anxiety

    I had friends in town for a few days last week. I worked while they were staying with me but let most everything else slide. Within moments of them leaving, I was overwhelmed with all I had to catch up on. My mind seemed to instantly fill with tasks that felt urgent: vacuum up all…

  • Identifying a New Secondary Loss, Nearly 3 Years Out

    The death of a loved one has a ripple effect. There’s the loss of that person and then there are the secondary losses—the shifts in routines that make a day feel off, the friendships that fade because the person who held them together is gone or people are too uncomfortable to maintain them, the end…

  • Dealing with Overwhelm after a Death

    Along with grief can come overwhelm. There is so much to do and it all feels simultaneously urgent and pointless. I remember staring at the forms I needed to file to take my husband’s estate through the probate process and being unable to comprehend how to complete them. Every blank space on the form seemed…

  • Befriending Overwhelm

    I spend a good part of my time at the intersection of Depression, Anxiety, and Grief. When overwhelm hits, which it often does, and a wave of panic rises up in my chest, I take a deep breath. I find my Buddhist practice very helpful when I feel that panic. Panic makes me feel like…

  • How to Be Gentle with Yourself

    I had to learn how to be gentle to myself. Maybe you need some help, too.

  • Trying to Reason with My Own Brain during a Panic Attack

    My first panic attack in almost four months gave me an opportunity to try to talk calmly to my poor revved-up brain.

  • Cutting Wire and Shifting My Narrative

    Being widowed often means having to learn to do things your partner used to do. These are bittersweet victories.

  • Recognizing My Own Toxic Positivity

    How could being positive ever be toxic? Well, when it makes you feel pressure to squelch any emotions that could be seen as “negative,” like sadness, grief, or fear. I’ve had my own struggles with toxic positivity. What I’ve learned is that reframing pain, sadness, and other emotions I used to see as negative into…

  • Recognizing Internalized Ableism on My Anniversary

    I am disabled and my late husband was disabled. We both had internalized ableism, which frustrated us both.

  • Scattering Ashes, Forgetting He’s Dead, and Intense Anxiety at 18 Months Out

    The night before I scattered my husband’s ashes outside Ushuaia, Argentina, my anxiety kicked in hard. None of my usual strategies helped.